Despite boosting pop society coverage, anal sex is still greatly stigmatized. After all, the old adage walk that males are right into it since it’s “tighter” 보다 your vagina and they’ve viewed it in porn, and women will sometimes acquiesce together a bargaining chip or save it for one-of-a-kind occasions only. While this might be true for some women, assuming the goes because that all females is fully unfair. A many women try anal no for any kind of dude, but because they’re into it themselves! Here, five women who have actually had anal sex explain their motives, just how they prep, and also whether or not it’s actually ever before gotten lock off.

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Probably the No. 1 point everyone desires to know is ... Does it hurt?

Woman A: It honestly walk hurt, be prepared, and use numerous lube if you want an less complicated time. The very first time ns tried that was with an ex, he said “don’t problem if we’re in the shower head it’s just like lube” *eye roll* that is absolutely false, usage lube.

Woman B: At times, it have the right to be uncomfortable, but I don"t recall the it ever really hurt. I"ve had actually partners who are really attentive and also listen to my needs, therefore I"ve never ever experienced pain. There are times, however, once a larger penis may cause cramping.

Woman C: for me, the did. That first time was like, "Oh to ~ god, nothing is supposed to walk in there." you really need to relax. Like a lot of deep breathing and also you have to let every little thing go. Climate it kinda stop hurting as soon as you finally relax, but for me, it can get poor again as soon as he start thrusting. I review that putting in a plug throughout foreplay help a lot, yet I"ve never ever used one.


Woman D: Yes! If the didn"t, this wouldn"t it is in a topic of conversation.

Woman E: It certainly hurt the first couple of times. Now? the doesn"t hurt in ~ all and also mostly feeling good.

Why carry out it?

Woman A: from my experience it is more about the pleasure of the male 보다 the female. For the guy, that is tighter feet — no to be crude — because that the female it hits different parts than continual sex and can feel good when excellent right.

Woman B: for me, anal play worsens my orgasm. The first toy ns tried was anal beads, and I to be surprised just how much pulling them out at the point of orgasm made the orgasm so lot stronger! that is the very same for me with plugs or a real, live, human penis. The orgasms I have actually when anal stimulation is involved are just so much more intense than other orgasms.

Woman C: I determined to try it because I"d heard it can be yes, really pleasant and some girls have the right to orgasm indigenous it. It"s additionally really taboo and naughty, and also I"m one of those girls who likes that. So I assumed I"d provide it a shot.

Woman D: i usually just do it once drunk and also if do the efforts to impress the happy dude I"m with.

Woman E: understanding that it"s type of taboo in a method makes that a large turn on. And having sex when you"re supervisor turned on (instead of like, routine post-date night sex) is means more satisfying overall. In my experience, anal is never the key event. It’s an ext like afterplay, or even the huge finale. It’s commonly for just 5 minutes after ~ we’ve been having intercourse because that a if (20–30 minutes.) after anal intercourse, sex is official over due to the fact that if I have an orgasm, there’s no method I have the right to continue. That’s how good anal sex is!

Who wanted to perform it more — you or her partner?

Woman A: The guy, mine ex certainly wanted to do it more. In fact, I obtained to his apartment that was decorated in candle after being gone for a few weeks. My ‘exciting surprise’ was anal.

Woman B: It was a boyfriend who originally talked me into trying it. Now, ns ask because that it around as much as my husband does.

Woman C: Me. I had actually heard that some girls love it, so I want to shot it. The guy I"m v is no really right into it, i m sorry is component of the reason I"ve just done it 3 times.

Woman D: Him. When it happens, it"s since I"ve conceded. Depends on how much I"m right into him ... And also afterward, I sort of feel like he "owes me something."

Woman E: I"ve done it v a couple of guys and also it"s always been a common desire.

What does that feel like the first time?

Woman A: The an initial time hurt. Use a the majority of lube. I could feel my ass gift stretched and it was incredibly unpleasant.

Woman B: ns imagine it can be painful with a lover that is not an extremely considerate, or if you are uncomfortable voice what you need. Because that me, us went very slow the very first time and let me get adjusted to the brand-new sensations. Once I was comfortable, however, i was begging him to speed up and go harder.

Woman C: It"s weird. The feels tight and also not pleasant. It feels like a muscle cramp. Prefer you"re make the efforts to open a muscle and also stretch it out and also it doesn"t want to listen. That"s what the feels favor at first. I didn"t like it. And then friend relax and it feels a tiny better.

Woman D: in ~ first, extremely unpleasant. Kinda feels prefer a penis going in her anus.

Woman E: The very first time it feels choose an uncomfortable clinical procedure.


What does that feel prefer over time?Woman A: the does get better over time, ns think a huge part of the problem is that relaxing is yes, really hard and also you finish up clenching up her body, consisting of your butt. This just makes it worse, due to the fact that well there is a prick going in there.

Woman B: ns don"t have to start as slowly anymore, usually, unless it has actually been a very long time. We incorporate anal play into our sex life ~ above a continuous basis, usually. The is actually my favourite porn to watch when I"m masturbating. The act itself and the thought of the plot both turn me on.

Woman C: that feels choose you"re full and also it"s super-intense.

Woman D: end time, girlfriend adjust. Similar to vaginal intercourse, i suppose.

Woman E: over time, you understand what come expect and also how to enjoy it. It additionally hurts less due to the fact that you"re not as tense and nervous (if you chosen it the very first time, that is!)

Does it ever before feel good?

Woman A: it does feel great after a while, simply be relaxed, use several lube, and I think that works ideal when the is coupled with clitoral stimulation.

Woman B: Oh, god, yes! i wouldn"t keep doing that if that didn"t!

Woman C: I recognize some girls who love that ... it"s one of those things that certainly takes more than one try to watch if you choose it.

Woman D: It never really feel good. Simply becomes more tolerable, ns suppose. It additionally depends on the dimension of his manhood.

Woman E: correctly! Anal sex feels good when you"re through someone who allows YOU be in manage of the speed and also force, if that makes sense. To add you have actually to incorporate with vaginal or clitoral stimulation for it to feeling really good.

Do you feeling like obtaining a wax back there is "expected"?

Woman A: Maybe, if his mouth is going all over near there, probably!

Woman B: I"m in a lengthy term relationship, so us actually help each various other groom a bit. I would certainly think if girlfriend wax elsewhere, you"d want to wax there together well. I"ve had it excellent before and it feels about the same as the other locations covered in a Brazilian.

Woman C: ns don"t think you have to get waxed. In the start of mine relationship, I"d obtain Brazilians, but now I seldom wax because that him. So i wasn"t waxed. it can the girl feel much more comfortable if she is waxed, if she worries about that stuff.

Woman D: No, a wax isn"t compelled ... Ns suppose any kind of dude who"s into anal wouldn"t it is in so details as to inquiry a smooth entryway.

Woman E: ns don"t think it"s expected, honestly. If a male is law anal v you, he probably doesn"t care about a little bit of herbal body hair back there.

On average, how soon in the partnership — if it"s a date scenario — perform you think it typically happens?

Woman A: because that me, the was about 6 months into our relationship. We had actually a kinky connection as that is, therefore I’m not certain what’s normal.

Woman B: True story – the man who is currently my husband and I went over there on the very first night, however that is very unusual for me! It just felt right with him, for factors that room now, ns guess, obvious, due to the fact that we"ve been together for end 7 years. I would certainly say normally as soon as you are comfortable really talking around sex. Also if girlfriend "clean up" before you beat anally, there space still times it it s okay messy suddenly so you have to be in ~ a allude in your partnership where that would certainly not it is in an issue.

Woman C: We had actually been together for 7 months prior to we walk it. But I know girls who execute it when they first hook up with a guy. However those room the girls who love it.

Woman D: Hmm ... In mine experience, if he"s right into it, you understand soon right into the relationship. This form of "fetish" isn"t quickly concealed, in my opinion.

Woman E: At the very least six month to a year in, as soon as you"ve already explored the more general sexual activities thoroughly and also feel comfortable v each various other to acquire even more intimate.

How lot lube? What brands are best?

Woman A: not sure just how much exactly, simply lather the on…

Woman B: ns really choose silicone lubes, favor Pjur or Uberlube. Recently my husband has argued we shot some thicker, much more viscous lubes for him (yes, that likes anal, too!) for this reason we will certainly be trying out some new ones this weekend. To plan a run to the adult save tomorrow.

Woman C: numerous lube! Like, lube ~ above me and lube top top him. Ns couldn"t even imagine act it there is no lube.

Woman D: Lots. Any kind. Also saliva if nothing else is available.

Woman E: Lube is tricky due to the fact that you don"t understand if it will feel okay till you try it. The an initial time I offered lube during anal sex (I think it was KY) I actually felt one uncomfortable study abroad sensation once the anal intercourse started that wore off eventually, yet it wasn"t very pleasant. I"m not a lube expert but we"ve currently been using Wet Platinum Premium Silicone and it"s perfect because that the occasion.

Do girlfriend bleed?

Woman A: i didn’t bleed yet I did feel stretching, I had actually to do him prevent a few times the first time since I to be scared skin to be going to rip.

Woman B: Occasionally, yet never much. There is a slight opportunity of tearing roughly the anus if you choose things fast and also hard, as I do.

Woman C: ns didn"t bleed (well, at least not the I know of). However I feel favor it"s totally possible, particularly if the guy forces it or friend don"t use lube (cringe).

Woman D: no that i recall.

Woman E: Nope! No bleeding.

Do you spread a bath towel on the bed or anything?

Woman A: Yes, I would certainly recommend dispersing a towel on the bed because there is constantly a possibility for a mess.

Woman B: Yes, usually. Good for overabundance lube and also in instance it gets a small messy.

Woman C: I"m no really certain why friend would? i feel choose it isn"t an ext messy than regular sex.

Woman D: paper stains room a risk and also should be considered collateral damage.

Woman E: Nope, no bath towel either. Unless you"re utilizing the whole bottle that lube (probably not recommended) anal sex isn"t any messier than vaginal sex in mine experience.

Is over there a huge cleanup afterward?

Woman A: numerous times that I have actually done that have remained in the shower head so no clean up. Ns haven’t had difficulties with feces or blood, simply semen so everything cleanup girlfriend would need for sex.

Woman B: Not really. I would say don"t engage in anal if friend feel favor you might need a bowel motion soon as that would boost the risk it will certainly be messy. Most of the time, it is not at all. If that is, a rapid jump in the shower head is all that is needed.

Woman C: ns don"t think there"s a large cleanup. Especially if you have actually a condom. Just slip it off and that"s every the cleanup us needed.

Woman D: Chipotle .

Woman E: not in mine experience! for me, it"s something that just lasts 5 minutes. You have to listen to her body.

are there beneficial things re: angle that we have to know?

Woman A: ns think doggy style with clitoral stimulation works well, or him spooning friend from behind, intimate and also sensual.

Woman B: It"s all about what is comfortable because that you. I prefer to it is in on my knee or stomach, but you might like a various angle. Ns think top top my knees is a great way for the recipient to regulate the speed, as long as their partner isn"t someone who is going come grab and also force the in.

Woman C: i did it doggy style the an initial time and also then ns did it v him sit on a couch (I was on top with my earlier to his chest sitting on him). The 2nd is certainly better. And also according to 2 gay men I know, the correct method to perform it is to have the girl ~ above top and also she have the right to ease herself down and go at her own pace, and once that happens you deserve to flip you yourself over therefore he"s on peak now and then you have the right to do everything you want. But the most crucial is because that the girl to go at her very own pace.

Woman D: i think doggy layout is most conducive.

Woman E: correctly! Doggy style is the most basic to start with. I"ve tried various other positions yet found doggy to be the best one.

Condoms still, obviously, right?

Woman A: I would certainly for the first couple of times. After ~ that, it depends on the partnership you have actually with the person you room doing the with.

Woman B: Oh, yes, uneven you and your partner as exclusive and also trust each various other implicitly. There is just as lot of a opportunity of contracting just about any STI there is, specifically for the receiver.

Woman C: entirely to the condoms.

Woman D: Even much more so!

Woman E: Yes, always, no matter what.

Have you ever had one orgasm from anal sex alone?

Woman A: No, I have not!

Woman B: Yes and also no. I usually use a vibrator on my clitoris together with anal penetration, but not always. Therefore I usually cum throughout anal sex but with that added clitoral stimulation. The times I"ve had actually anal sex there is no a vibrator, I"ve had actually a quite various sensation the what I typically think of together an orgasm, yet it is really pleasurable. Maybe it is a different kind of orgasm? I"m simply not sure.

Woman C: No, however I"ve heard it"s possible.

Woman D: Nope, yet then again, I"ve never had actually one from quality penetration alone.

Woman E: No. My #1 reminder for pleasurable anal sex is to carry out it doggy style, and also while your guy is thrusting far (slowly in ~ first!) use your hand come stimulate her clitoris. If friend can bring yourself to orgasm this means during anal sex, you"ll view why world like that so much.

This write-up was initially published in 2014 and also has been updated.

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Carina HsiehSex & relationship EditorCarina Hsieh stays in NYC through her French Bulldog Bao Bao — follow her on Instagram and Twitter • Candace Bushnell once referred to as her the Samantha Jones of Tinder• She enjoys hanging the end in the candle aisle the TJ Maxx and getting lost in Amazon spirals.
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